"I forget sometimes," my mom told me recently, "that we'ved lived such a great adventure, and then I read the reviews of your book and it all comes over me again and I think: We really did that!" My dad calls me on the handheld VHF radio in the mornings and asks if there's been a new review. Since I often can't access Amazon because of my poor signal, a kind friend emails me whenever new reviews pop up and I pass them on to my parents. In fact, one of my favorite things since getting my memoir Raised in Ruins published, about growing up in the ruins of a remote Alaskan cannery with only my family, is sharing reviews of the book with my parents. It's really the only way I have of thanking them for gifting me with the adventure of a lifetime. The reviews by women often say something like this one by Cynthia Yoder: "Maybe it's because I'm a mom, but by the end of the book, I found myself awed by the author's mother, who continually worked to protect her children while her husband was away logging." Male reviewers identified with my dad, such as Benjamin Scribner: 'I could relate to her dad, a Vietnam veteran, as I myself am a veteran of the war in the Persian Gulf. I felt I understood him in ways only another veteran could. Over all, I felt this book down to my soul.' Nancy Guess focused on both of my parents: "Meet the Neilsons: a father who is a Viet Nam war vet with PTSD and a real-life MacGyver; a young mom of 5 kids who is tasked with protecting her children from the dangers of the wilderness and both parents ensuring that the children have childhoods." One review is now part of family lore, the one by Ann C, who wrote: "The writing is rich with detail and the personalities of family members are vivid, irritating, lovable and more--in a word real." After I read it I asked my family who they thought was the "irritating" one. Each of us laid claim to it, trying to top each other by pointing out our most irritating traits and actions. I'm sure it will come up in family reunions for years to come. Like many parents, my parents think their children are the most talented. Many of the reviews didn't mention how I did with the actual writing, so they were pleased when Terry Levin, an accomplished writer himself, wrote: "It gives a very real sense of what it was like to be a kid growing up in the wilderness and how such a kid could develop a profound love of life that, objectively, was filled with backbreaking labor, few comforts of modern civilization, significant dangers to life and limb and a great deal of isolation. And like the best storytellers, she SHOWS us how this happened, not just telling us that it did. In reading her blog, I sometimes noticed upon finishing an entry that I had become so enthralled that I forgot I was reading: that it seemed I had just soaked up information.... There were portions of this book where she achieved this same effect, especially the lengthy chunk about dealing with an invasion of wolves. Writing that seems effortless is, we all know, often the writing that requires the most effort." hile I was writing down my childhood memories, I didn't think that much about how those in my family would react to what I wrote about them. I was told repeatedly by the experts, when I researched writing memoirs, that in order to write your truth, you needed to shut out the awareness of family and friends reading and judging it later.
After it was published, I did wonder how my family would receive it. I soon found out how at least one of them felt about it as my second youngest brother, Robin, shared with me his reactions in real time as he read Raised in Ruins. "You would be amazed at the memories my brain is remembering by reading your book!" he texted me as he read. "You have no idea how emotional I am right now! Good though! I feel young! I have energy I haven't felt in forever." Twenty years ago, Robin nearly died in a catastrophic car accident that left him with permanent pain and he was put on highly addictive prescription medication to deal with it. Like many in America, he suffered from addiction. "Living in pain every single day of my life for the past twenty years," he texted, "and being drug free for over a month and fighting that battle, I don't feel any pain right now! ...I even remember the smell of finger paint.... This is amazing. It's a roller coaster. Man the ups and downs! I'm crying one minute and laughing hysterically the next. Your writing is awesome! I can't compare it really to any one writer I have ever read. I have never thought of writers as artists but you truly are. You paint a picture of our upbringing. At times I forget I'm in it till my name comes up! Fantastic!" I had never imagined when I was writing the book that it would affect anyone this way and actually, physically help them, let alone someone I loved. Finally, after he finished the book, he wrote me perhaps the greatest compliment I'll ever receive that left me--and continues to leave me--in tears. He texted: "Your book has taken me out of deep depression.... Your book is changing my life! What a relief! ...It's amazing how we forget who we were and who we are." Robin said that he didn't have to be depressed because he realized he was essentially a good person and it was because of how we were raised. I can agree with that. So thank you, Mom and Dad. I can't imagine any review I receive ever topping that one, but if you read Raised in Ruins please consider leaving a review. I promise to share it with my parents. Raised in Ruins US link: amzn.to/2UQHxKs UK link: amzn.to/2QMMdxW (or post on whichever site you prefer)
13 Comments
Georgie
5/9/2020 03:58:56 am
Loved this book on kindle and pleased to now have the paperback in my hands, too. Engrossed from the start, you undoubtedly know your craft. I sincerely hope there will be more from you in the not too distant future.
Reply
Tara
5/19/2020 10:40:07 am
Thanks so much, Georgie! I love hearing that people have the paperback edition. Hard copy always seems more of a book to me, more real. Stay safe. Tara
Reply
Daneel
5/10/2020 02:32:47 pm
Adored your book. Now that it's been published, has Chris told you WHY he ran after the bear and what he planned to do if he caught up with it?
Reply
Aleya
5/11/2020 11:43:09 pm
Yup, tears!
Reply
Tara
5/19/2020 10:31:15 am
Thanks for continuing to follow my blog, Aleya! I need to get back into a regular routing with it. When my signal got so bad this winter I kind of rage quit after being frustrated time and again trying to get anything through. I hope you're doing well and staying safe. Tara
Reply
Janet Engle
5/13/2020 06:03:41 pm
Just read your book; LOVED it; I have only gone by the area where
Reply
Tara
5/19/2020 10:29:30 am
Thanks so much for reading it, Janet! I love hearing that you knew Rand, I would love to know more. If you want to correspond you can reach me at alaskaforreal.tara@gmail.com or through my blog here (tap the 3 horizontal lines upper left & it should lead you to a contact page). I'd love to hear how you found out about the book. Stay safe! Tara
Reply
Kimberly
5/16/2020 03:48:33 pm
Your book just popped up when I searched on Amazon for books, and much to my delight! I had always imagined what it would be like to live off grid in a place like Alaska in all its natural splendor. Visiting Alaska has been on my bucket list as far as I can remember, so this sucked me right in. On a side note, I also remember the Swiss Family Robinson as a kid (I'm now 53 yo).
Reply
Tara
5/19/2020 10:37:10 am
Thank you so much, Kimberly! I love finding out how people come across my book, and of course their reaction to it. I shared this with my parents and they were so touched, and asked me to thank you on their behalf. Would you consider copy and pasting this to an Amazon review? It's supposed to help the book, or so my publisher tells me.
Reply
6/8/2020 05:59:04 am
I just finished your book and loved it. I fished in SE in the 90’s and really fell for it. Hope you write a sequel.
Reply
Claudia Volano
8/5/2020 06:06:52 am
I was to take my first trip to Alaska this summer...Covid cancelled that. Upon planning the trip I researched and made a list of Alaska books, fiction and non-fiction I'd like to read prior to the trip [along with binge watching Northern Exposure]. This memoir is so clear and resonant. There is so much to acknowledge but the biggest thing is that your amazing parents had a knack for being disciplined with the kids but allowing them so much freedom and providing them with so much culture. You were isolated but not really sheltered. I am totally astounded by Gary's engineering abilities. The New House, along with everything else he built was miraculously designed and built by non-professional architects, engineers and crew. Bravo to all of you and to you Tara for writing this. BTW, I read this on Kindle and was disappointed that I couldn't see the map well at all. Is there any place I can see it enlarged?
Reply
jim neilson
5/6/2021 12:36:34 pm
Saw this pic of your mom and dad nd realized how much I miss them. The year we spent getting reacquainted is one of my top ones.(1975) Your aunt and I moved to California and then you guys to Alaska. We've never gotten together since. It's been over 45 years since we have seen each other!!
Reply
Angela Speck
6/8/2021 01:45:16 pm
I have enjoyed Alaska books for forty years. I am picky on what I buy because some of them are so full of bull. The past few years has been hit and miiss because I have already bought the good ones and there isn't any left. I stumbled upon yours and was hopeful it was one I can read over and over during the long winter months. I am glad I bought it. I fell in love with all of you. Your mom and dad are amazing people. So are you and you siblings. I live in the bush nine months of the year and down on Cook Inlet for the commercial fishing season for the other three months. I can relate to your story. Your book fits nicely with my dozens of favorite others waiting for winter to come. Thank you.
Reply
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorTara Neilson (ADOW) Archives
June 2021
Categories
All
|